Sunday, June 12, 2011

party line


i followed
the phone lines
and found myself
in the back room, time
collected, had
collected itself, no
mirrors involved

i waited on
another parties ring
peered out
towards their farm
i chose to listen
intent on
hearing your voice, intent
on writing your name
over and over again
as if my own, that had
been my intent,  i cut

the line - writing
a shorter name, yet the time
stands still in a room
that refuses dusting

bkmackenzie
copyrighted 2011

Posted for One Shoot Sunday - Rob Hanson

16 comments:

  1. "in the back room, time
    collected had
    collected itself, no
    mirrors involved"
    wow. Even when time stands still, other accumulations follow. Extremely clever poem, bkm

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  2. fab word play bk...this made me think of one waiting on the question of a suitor, the witing on a ring, a name like my own...maybe way off base but hey, its poetry

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  3. very cool and builds an intensity yet leaves you questioning the past ...thanks for sharing

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  4. "i followed
    the phone lines
    and found myself
    in the back room..."
    wow, loved your poem...

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  5. Beautiful and intense account, I would say an account, the reflections are so vivid that true, no mirrors would be involved.The time stands, yet in my heart,I wish to erase some of it.
    Thanks.

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  6. i found myself in the back room as well - time collecting itself and a room who refuses to be dusted...think we all refuse to be dusted every once and a while... in a way...

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  7. Loved how you set this one, and the clever use of "i cut/ the line -writing". So true, we may choose another name, but those memories shall remain. Very much enjoyed your poem ~

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  8. What a notion...a room with will and intent of its own. I'm liking it.

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  9. Subtle nuances of the wait... simplistic, yet profound depth. Nice write.

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  10. haven't been around in a bit...so nice to be back and reading your words! this photo prompt is awesome and your piece...satisfies my desire for the poetry I've been missing!

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  11. enjoyed this...particularly this line "time
    collected, had
    collected itself,"...flows so well.

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  12. the collecting of time, the cutting of lines--wonderful. Thank you.

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  13. Lovely poem, the idea of the backroom with its' collection of time and artifacts is wonderful.

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  14. The waiting retreats to a room refusing to be dusted! The personified ambience is enchanting!

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  15. I liked it very much! Timeless quality.

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