Tuesday, August 23, 2011

fantasy team




i have not come to belly up to the bar
or to cheer on the team

i have come to ask why you are not
wearing your ring and to remind you of
your daughters birthday, but i'll

take a black russian (Putin politics
on ice) check the climate of
our vows - take future bets on this filly

later we can barter in bed, massage
each other's genitals, melt any Siberian
tundra that might remain

i will tell you i love the accent
in your whispers, the warmth
of your fingers across this belly

counting on one 
for the home team - and one for
future of my fantasies

bkmackenzie
copyrighted 2011


19 comments:

  1. I don't know whether I should sigh over your heavenly lines or hit someone's head...maybe both. :-) I like these lines:

    later we can barter in bed, massage
    each other's gentiles, melt any Siberian
    tundra that might remain

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  2. ...check the climate of our vows.

    I love so much about this, wildly imaginative and it really flows. But another poem this week that makes me want to shake the woman a bit... tell her to not be SO nice... he deserves a bit more "gettin' after". I wouldn't be so able to play that game...

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  3. A fascinating poem beautifully conveying the ambivalence we all surely feel about love and lovers and loving after a few go-rounds. Did you mean the pun on gentiles? xxxj

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  4. oh lala this poem made me a little steamy :)

    great write as always my friend

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  5. Wow quite the sensual peice, wonderfully written!

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  6. Powerful the way you created the pause so that everything turns on "but i'll " ...passion muddles the unforgivable.

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  7. check the climate of our vows...wow...this is a powerful write bk...nice play on the fantasy team...and like the word play on it in the final lines...really well done..

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  8. There's some contradiction and mixed messages here, as is so often the case in love, so you're batting a thousand there on realism. Bartering is indeed the process, sad but true, and like most commercial enterprises, can take the fun out of fantasy. Excellent and uncomfortably close to home poem.

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  9. You have a talent for reducing several chapter-lengths to 110 well-placed words. Turning point for me also was those words, early:

    "...but i'll
    take a Black Russian..."

    From that moment on--sizzle, sizzle!

    To bkm, who "writes them as she sees them"
    -clink!!! (Loved it, girl.)
    PEACE!

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  10. Quite a departure for you my dear. I'll have a cosmo and hang out a while with you. You seem to have seductive powers! Wonderful write as always, G.

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  11. white Russian for me - just another day of poems and NHL

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  12. I will sit and have a drink too, to observe what goes on through read

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  13. heck this is awesome bk...the climate of the vows...melting the siberian tundra...at least for a moment..

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  14. Really like this entire poem. Black Russians (Putin politics
    on ice

    Just great! I feel there are several messages in this poem.

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  15. The foundation of any relationship... trust which is too often missing. Intense piece.

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  16. The break returning to the connection is really felt here, sensual with a little distant pain still attached. Beautiful write ~ Rose

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  17. Love the gentle and authentic eroticism in this.
    Immensely evocative imagery.

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