Saturday, April 2, 2011

elevated states




a window of repetitive motion
prevents any thought of leaping, opportunity
breathing diffident

inconspicuous consummation masked
in the obvious retrograde states
of emergency - constrained in

breaking news: (un)decided lottery
(un)precedented find, (un)recoverable vibration;
(un)acceptable deviants

any elevator hoped - labeled,
in case of fire use stairs, a solemn
sermon for definition of  free willed

EXIT

bkmackenzie
copyrighted 2011


12 comments:

  1. excellent cadence and flow...would love to hear this one read aloud...you imagery pops here and there but i like the elevator...

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  2. I love the elevator! Up and down, up and down...a window of repetitive motion...Exit!

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  3. Love the musicality of the prose.

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  4. I'm going to take this as a hotel poem, the whisk from ground to room become a trope on the freedom to get off on any damn floor you please (free will). It's pretty cerebral and jumps around a lot -- but then so does thought, free thought at least. And when a person lives a lot of their life up in their head, this sort of movement between floors is par for the course. Nice kicker at the end, that when all this fails there's always a Plan B - Use Stairs! :) - Brendan

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  5. I love your new blog. And I love your mind, the way it looks at the world like a child with the most profound views.

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  6. My God bkm.. I think this is my fav of yours... so greatly written, & use of clever imagery is amazing

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  7. What an excellent poem, Barb, the flow is so natural and well-paced.

    Pamela

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  8. I've been looking for the stairs a lot lately...nice imagery.

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  9. Wow, bkm, what a FANTASTIC poem! So skilled. And your site looks AMAZING!!!!!!!! A totally professional poetry site, just splendid!

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  10. "a window of repetitive motion
    prevents any thought of leaping"

    i LOVE this! you are brilliant. amazing poem!
    dani

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  11. profound words.

    very lovely imagery.

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  12. Genius. An amazing poem. Hope to see more from you- I'm Following.

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