Blasphemy!!
torn holes through all yarn
darning i had never done; what else
to do i, but run, and run...
screaming out, you called
by name, i ran and ran 'til
on tear came - words
ran too, down
your face, traced my heart
for years replaced and i cried
long, for what was spent - where heaven, prayer?
nothing sent
and with vow - now
spoken a God to hear
this heart broken, his promise where?
i placed the gate (closed) on
my soul - its innocence
of long ago...
bkmackenzie
copyrighted 2011
Posted for One Shot Wednesday: Where Poets, Writers and Artists Meet.
You certainly captured the depth of this with such tenderness. Such a sad and lonely feeling. beautiful poem.
ReplyDeletethank you Suzi...a childhood memory...bkm
ReplyDeleteyou never cease to amaze me...........
ReplyDeleteoh...strong close...i really like the last several lines...perhaps they will come...
ReplyDeleteReally powerful--particularly the ending. Thank you for sharing. (I hope the gate opened up eventually)
ReplyDeletethank you Neva, Brian and ds...of course gates open and close throughout our life...but some as for all of us make a stronger impact on who we become...bkm
ReplyDeleteAmazing piece. The gate is quite the stark contrasting part of this offering, makes me feel quite gray and shut in. Very revealing and raw, which always speaks with a higher power.
ReplyDeleteWell done, you always know how to knock it out of the park.
Wow, this takes my breath away!
ReplyDeleteI can feel the wind with this one. Brrrr.
ReplyDeleteamazing...this week I find myself wanting to run and close the gate on someone close to me. It is so painful to keep it open but sometimes necessary in order for me to heal. Thank you for this beautiful poem, it touched my heart today...
ReplyDeletei placed the gate (closed) on
ReplyDeletemy soul...this gave me shivers - very strong and highly emotional..putting closed in brackets makes it even stronger
Such a sad and lonely piece!
ReplyDeleteFull of emotion and beautifully written.
ReplyDeleteThe words run as fast as the emotions in this one, and give that same breathless pain in the side you get from running too hard. Stark and intense, but I do get a little of the vulnerability of that childhood memory from it too bkm.
ReplyDeletePS here: " 'til
on tear came - words/ran too, down.." do you mean one tear instead of on tear, or tears instead of tear, (on tears came,)Just wondered--it stands out a bit, but that may have been what you were trying for.
PPS I love reading your sidebar.
hedgewitch, great comment here...it was intentional "on tear came"...as if one single tear held back years of emotion in the words that followed...bkm
ReplyDeleteThis is so moving. I felt such sadness and despair through it, all of it packaged in betrayal. Very powerful, bkm.
ReplyDeleteI love that quote of Goethe's, and I do love this poem as well. You get us right into the feeling, the breathlessness of the pain, as though we too are funning. . . and the tear - single, poignant. This is very vine.
ReplyDeleteWhere we've been shaes who we are my dear.
ReplyDeleteI meant to say shapes. My keyboard keeps sticking...arrg.
ReplyDeleteSomewhere we share some stories..though perhaps time and place differ..the impact and its spiritual residue remain. I know this place because I've been there. Thank you..bkm, Gay @beachanny
ReplyDelete"I placed the gate (closed) on my soul......." such beautiful writing, conveying the remembered tears. Wonderful!
ReplyDeleteSomehow every time I come here and read your words I sigh for their beauty, your flow, and how so very well everything comes together. Wonderfully written even in the sad notions this depicts warmth! ~April
ReplyDeleteOH B,
ReplyDeletethose last lines are so elegantly constructed. So real...that makes them all the more poignant- let's get out of there
BKM, this poem was filled with emotion. written from the depths. I FELT this poem!
ReplyDeleteHearts broken, promises failed
ReplyDeletea child can wait a lifetime to hear words she needs
All this piece needs is rain.
Excellent thanks for sharing with One Shot
Beautifully done! Thanks Seemed very sad....
ReplyDeleteThis is heart-wrenching in both the images and the words and the emotions so beautifully expressed...
ReplyDeleteThe closing of the gate like the closing of a heart.
Good stuff - another dandy One Shot!
ReplyDeleteoh the pain and betrayals of a life time....
ReplyDeletewhich your poem beautifully expresses~
It's a beautiful poem, evoking an array of emotions. Well done.
ReplyDeleteThank you for sharing your talent here. I am so moved by your poem.
ReplyDeleteAck! Emotions oozed out of this one.. a sense of loneliness reflected itself all too clearly in the words..
ReplyDeleteVery artistically written, bkm..
Wish you a wonderful New Year!!
Is it "on" tear? Just curious. I hope the gate opens now.
ReplyDeleteWow! Such raw emotion in this poem...I felt every line to the end when the gate was shut. Great piece...thanks for sharing. I really enjoyed this read over and over again
ReplyDeletePart and parcel of life..gates opening and closing. And we do find ways...
ReplyDeleteHere is my one shot:
musical whirlwind
Beautiful poem with such sadness but so real. Last lines...incredible. You are so talented. :)
ReplyDeleteI have to ask is that you in the window?
hi bkm.... your name always intrigues me... nice piece... like the use of parenthesis (not used enough in poetry I always think). Your rhyming free-verse style has strong impetus and you create some evocative imagery also. Good one shot, aye
ReplyDeleteWarmest salad
Luke @ WordSalad
..was wondering if this is you on the header pic...?
ReplyDeleteStrongly stated, solid piece.
ReplyDelete