Saturday, June 18, 2011

i read


i read about
you, right above the snow line
you left word to reach
up, up toward the blue
to hold tight to the miminimal shore line
life it too little, it's days too few

that falling bares
 something
colder, shorter, unkinder than thoughts
 of a sky

i read you reached
for a heaven, left this earth
that you never really
as i read just
 died


bkmackenzie
copyrighted 2011

Posted for One Shoot Sunday at One Stop Poetry
photo by Chris Galford


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22 comments:

  1. dustusJune 18, 2011 at 9:56 PM

    "that falling bears / something / colder, shorter, unkinder than thoughts / of a sky" lovely commentary in a creative, poetic commemoration.

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  2. Steve IsaakJune 19, 2011 at 1:10 AM

    Intriguing line breaks/word choices.

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  3. MonikaJune 19, 2011 at 2:47 AM

    You captured the essence of the picture and heightened it to a new level of enlightenment. True, the choice of breaks captivates the reader, taking him into your world of imagery.
    Beautiful.

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  4. Brian MillerJune 19, 2011 at 3:36 AM

    nice. well spun piece bk.

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  5. Kodjo DeynooJune 19, 2011 at 4:09 AM

    I read about you, and I saw you.. congrats BKM

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  6. AnonymousJune 19, 2011 at 4:39 AM

    Our lives are always close to the minimal shoreline...

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  7. ClaudiaJune 19, 2011 at 5:13 AM

    i love the right above the snow line...you picked up something real and gave this a whole new dimension...

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  8. FireblossomJune 19, 2011 at 5:29 AM

    falling bears??? wow, look out below!

    sorry, bk, i couldn't resist!

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  9. AnonymousJune 19, 2011 at 5:49 AM

    That photo - "graffiti in the snow" - is fascinating - and you used words to tell the story,a nd tell it well. Good one, B.K.

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  10. hedgewitchJune 19, 2011 at 7:46 AM

    Yes, it's interesting what we can do with literacy,knowledge, how even the poorest and most marginal reach for art to lift themselves above the minimal. Nice one, bkm.

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  11. signed...bkmJune 19, 2011 at 7:57 AM

    thanks everyone - hope I corrected some of my grammar...I put this together quick before heading to bed and as some know I can be a little short on the editing side...please forgive...glad you like it..bkm

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  12. steveroniJune 19, 2011 at 11:14 AM

    As with any sentence of worth, drop the words. What is left behind will stir the human heart, its very soul...

    forget where I read that!
    GOOD!

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  13. Jenne' R. Andrews June 19, 2011 at 1:04 PM

    Intense, beautiful, imaginative/painful, moving-- valuable. xxxj

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  14. BeachannyJune 19, 2011 at 1:27 PM

    Multilayered - has a personal feel but an application so universal. Well done, as always. Gay

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  15. amfJune 19, 2011 at 2:02 PM

    Enjoyed how you used, I read; nice take on the photo ~

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  16. UnknownJune 19, 2011 at 4:00 PM

    Beautiful words, the message of those lingering before you in space and time. The symbol of their art sits wonderfully in this piece. Great write! ~Rose

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  17. PatriciaJune 19, 2011 at 5:35 PM

    life it too little, it's days too few...
    so true. You captured this beautifully.

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  18. flaubertJune 19, 2011 at 6:15 PM

    Beautiful piece of writing, Barb. The solemness of it is intriguing.

    Pamela

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  19. Sherry Blue SkyJune 19, 2011 at 7:37 PM

    So beautiful. "Its days too few". Yes.

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  20. SheilaJune 19, 2011 at 8:24 PM

    I believe none of us never really "just die" - enjoyed this and was so happy to see that you stopped by my blog today :) hope you are well.

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  21. annell4June 20, 2011 at 2:57 AM

    Really nice post! Beautiful and loved the image.

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  22. Ann GrenierJune 20, 2011 at 1:33 PM

    So much inspired and imagined from graffiti many would see as a blur of chaos. Reaching for the sky. Lovely.

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