Monday, April 11, 2011

coupled strength....Shadorma



i.

in the end
a candle will light
and lead me
towards night
to the door from where I came
to sip wine longer

ii

it the swell
of wines calming breath
held in love
held in length
that warms the heart in the night
coupled by loves strength


bkmackenzie
copyrighted 2011

posted for both Magpie Tales


35 comments:

  1. Quite nice on the form, barbara, and the mood is pensive and reflective, leaving a vintage bouquet on the palate.

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  2. The rapturous enigma of wine is beautifully captured!

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  3. nice feel esp in the second verse...

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  4. Nice and smooth.Well written Shadorma!

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  5. Wine perhaps as more than wine..a symbol for so much and beautifully expressed here in your two shadormas. Well written as always. Gay

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  6. A beautiful piece as all of your work is.....

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  7. Lovely, Barbara, especially the first piece.

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  8. thank you all..I could not really tell if those we tea candles in the wine glass... and being two of them..thoughts pulled to double everything...bkm

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  9. Light and wine, the c(o)upp(l)ed blood of Love.

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  10. Just beautiful...a poem to get lost in. Thank you.

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  11. the swell of wine's calming breath - lovely lines

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  12. This wraps itself around me..lovely!

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  13. A lovely poem.
    (Should not the first word of the second stanza be "it's" rather than "it"?)

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  14. Wonderful! Very well composed. The words slipped by like those joyful times!

    Hugs x

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  15. Beautifully done. I found the first piece to be especially evocative, Each line seems to bring a surprise that then instantly makes perfect sense.

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  16. Reflective, evocative piece. Stunning!

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  17. Lovely. It left me feeling warm and relaxed.

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  18. The Shadorma is rather nice as it allows you a little more play than a haiku. I really liked "..the swell of wines calming breath".

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  19. The shadorma works so well here.

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  20. Amazing, wonderful work - no surprise, coming from you.

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  21. Quite beautiful, almost serene, tranquil and absolutely wonderful.

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  22. A beautiful and strong poem Bkm....I always love what you write!! I hope that your husband is doing okay....please let me know...prayers will continue...:-)

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  23. oh that first verse just takes the cake :) I loved where you've taken the image; in both takes! Nice one Mackie! :)

    My Magpie Post

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