Sunday, October 24, 2010

Papilionoidea


i saw a girl walk by, odd
she was using lightning rods for curlers
they seemed to give her direction
like antennas on a papilionoidea
while sparks shot out, up
from the tips
of her silver toed boots, shooting
stars they were
that

required a different, solitary kind of attention
one with her name on it -
pink bows, black gloves kind of name
fame was her motive, her action, walking
with reaction in mind, time
and timing (wristwatch ring,
ringing "hello") holding
her wings even keel
their eyes
sat asymmetrical, metrically off
one focused forward
one focused behind, blind too plus
everyone else could see - she
was going to be somebody someday - maybe
later today - she
floated down the wet gray walk
of a city dripping morning news - lightning flashed!

dashed she did
heading straight for the alley
i ran after her
just as she caught a ride on the back
of an alley cat with two left feet and a crooked tail
he scampered  up the escape ladder
to the top floor - she yelled out  "I want to 
learn to fly - before I head off to
to beauty college"...

bkmackenzie
2010

random musings.....on butterflies disguised as people - are you one?

Posted for One Shot Wednesday; Where Poets and Writers Meet

44 comments:

  1. ha. surreal imagery....loved it...on the back of an alley cat...and smiles at what she yelled...

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  2. I love the Magritte way you have with words!
    Splendid surrealality...is that even a word?

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  3. This poem was a delight from start to finish. What a delightful picture of this young woman you painted with your words.

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  4. What a wonderful whimsical piece of reading...I was taken in at once by the title; of course I looked it up to be sure. Then, the poem kept me reading each line a time or two to make sure I read it correctly...I could see it all playing out in my mind so clearly. An excellent poem!

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  5. What whimsy and imagery, nice job. I commented on your other poem under Susan...signed in to the wrong google account.

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  6. A wonderfully rich imaginative entertaining and fun read! Love the lightning rods for curlers, and her catching a ride on the back of the alley cat. Pretty darn cool:)

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  7. You have played with the words beautifully..bkm ,her amibition walking using lightning rods ,her thinking and the final end of the poem.Enjoyed it

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  8. what a lovely imagery that your words created here, bkm!

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  9. You sure know how to paint a picture....love it ;)

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  10. I hope she did fly...

    The last line had me grinning, bkm. What a unique and visual and startling piece. Loved it!

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  11. Subject verb problems & some word choices that I don't think serve the poem. There's movement of thought at least.

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  12. What a magical weaving of imagery & words here. An artful puzzle that deserves extra readings and musings to savor.

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  13. How funny! I just love your descriptions here.

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  14. I enjoyed you One Shot, wonderful!

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  15. Good write. Surreal as it was, half way through I thought you'd met Lady Gaga but the fireworks scared her off me. Like this kind of stuff; lots of fun to read. Thanks, Gay @beachanny

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  16. This was a delightfully clever poem, BKM. Such fun to read!

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  17. almost magical surreal..wonderfully written with a great use of imagery
    also loved this line for the pace:
    ..fame was her motive, her action, walking
    with reaction in mind, time
    and timing...

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  18. I love this. Great one shot. Love and Light, Sender

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  19. Its stark and powerful imagery... I enjoyed it a lot...

    ॐ नमः शिवाय
    Om Namah Shivaya
    Twitter: @VerseEveryDay
    Blog: http://shadowdancingwithmind.blogspot.com

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  20. I love the colorful whimsy in this. From start to finish (love the last line!), it was a delight.

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  21. What a wonderfully abstract and surreal description. I loved every line.

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  22. Butterflies as people.. lovely poem, surreal in wordplay.. nice one Mackie! :)

    My One Shot Is Here

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  23. "was going to be somebody someday - maybe
    later today" - and the butterfly was someone! Great imagination!

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  24. This I call a POEM, a real poem- written so that saying 'Great one'is kind of not enough... I just got the feeling and the magic to me it brought.
    ;)

    reading you is always a pleasure.
    Dulce

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  25. You are an awesome poet. Each time I read your stuff, it inspires me to write better!

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  26. Was she the catwoman?

    nice surrealistic imagery here!

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  27. Love the first stanza on this. :)

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  28. Beautifully weird and cinematic.

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  29. I loved this even more the second time through. Wonderful images, what an imagination! Good one, bkm!

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  30. I am not a man dreaming I'm a butterfly, I'm a butterfly dreamiing I'm a man.

    Nice piece... rather lovely in fact, despite it's oddity.

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  31. What an imagination! I'm sure she was heading for Witch School!

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  32. Wow loved it bkm...I think she will eventually need a part two that finds her in beauty college lol. I love how the odd ones make you smile deep inside. Thank you for sharing.

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  33. Love the fun you had with this; loved the fun I had with this.

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  34. just as she caught a ride on the back
    of an alley cat with two left feet and a crooked tail

    Loved it!

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  35. BKM, I liked this one when I read it before; and I like it even more when I read it again!

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  36. Interesting, confusing, engrossing. I really like it.

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  37. vivid imagery,
    I see you and the girl running and have everything there...

    it is kind of weird indeed.

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  38. Barbara,
    I really enjoyed reading your poem. The pace and imagery were captivating!

    A wonderfully weird journey with words...

    Best wishes, Eileen

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  39. A wonderful poem, lots of imagery.It leaves one thinking.

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