I will not celebrate you in death
so - should you go there you are on your own
I came to like you here after
your birth - not scorning the soul you came with, equipped to fight
fires much greater than the spark I could
provide you -
I loved you as a human - half god, half
demon that crawled my leg and bit my
heart - I love you still as a friend, a fellow
worshiper of medieval wisdom - and as I
nursed you towards the climbing tree
(that now lays on its side), I celebrate you
watching the fallen - still with leaf
and life - clinging to beauty and breathing
in its own sorrow - no self pity or denial
my hands fractured in service to
aid you any further - and loving you yet is easy,
never painful, even as I watch your own - I celebrate
the breath you embrace --but I will not celebrate
you in death ---
No, I do not believe in it....
bkmackenzie
copyrighted 2010
Posted for One Shot Wednesday, Where Poets and Writers Meet ---
have not had a chance to write anything new this week and I know some have already read this one...bkm
half god, half demon crawled up your leg and bit your heart...that is a wicked line...
ReplyDeletethere is a great spiritual level to this as well..
what a beauty in poetry that carries heavy love and distinct characters...love every word in this piece.
ReplyDeletemasterful and wonderful job.
This is one amazing poem - strong, loving, beseeching, entreating.............who could resist such a call to life? Fantastic write, bkm! Wowzers.
ReplyDeletePowerful words, bkm. Your writing reminds me of Dylan Thomas. Beautiful!
ReplyDeleteA really good poem of epitaph.
ReplyDeleteVery interesting and emotional .. liked it a lot..
ReplyDeleteॐ नमः शिवाय
Om Namah Shivaya
Twitter: @VerseEveryDay
Blog: http://shadowdancingwithmind.blogspot.com
Beautiful and Powerful poem.
ReplyDeleteThough we met little through comments ,I am happy to award you for your poetry work which I enjoyed.Get it at
http://umaspoembook.blogspot.com/2010/10/i-rejoice-giving-awards.html
That last line....wow.
ReplyDeletestunning, captivating. read it through many times.
ReplyDeleteVery powerful words.. strongly expressed..
ReplyDeletehttp://jinglepoetry.blogspot.com/2010/10/poetry-potluck-natures-elements-air.html
Greetings, friend!!
It is Monday, I sincerely invite you to join us for a Monday Poetry Potluck party, bring in 1 to 3 poem treats to share, and have fun tasting other poets treats.
You will have 60 hours enjoying the fun.
Hurry up, the more you share, the happier we are.
Hope to see you in our party, hurry up, the earlier you are in, the more traffic you get...
to link in, click on the link via this comment, then look at the blue link button at the end of the post, click on the button, have your poem link copy and pasted in the first box, then enter your name, at last your email address...let us know if you need help by leaving a comment under the same post...
Beautifully expressed, BKM. I personally believe in celebrating people in life rather than in death. So many times at peopl.e's funerals one hears wonderful words about the person's life. I wonder if the person while he/she was living ever really heard those words when he/she could have appreciated them.
ReplyDeletethis is beautifully written with such conviction. Is it about one's children?
ReplyDeletebkm, what a haunting piece! i love it! :)
ReplyDelete"that crawled my leg and bit my heart" just one pungent part of a very fine poem. Nice work, bkm.
ReplyDeletePoem on ...
Nicely layered piece, with levels of meaning. Loved it. Read it many times, and I agree with Pat. You have a Dylan Thomas style. (And btw, he's a favorite of mine...as are you L-)
ReplyDeleteOh My BKM..once again..you take my breath away with every line..i can't even begin to pick up a favorite! LOVED it all..Dylan Thomas it is, but yours is flavored i might add..Excellent One shot :)
ReplyDeleteNeed to read between the lines...my favorite kind of poetry.
ReplyDelete(But things that crawl up my leg usually bite me on the butt!)
This poem is to be tasted and savored, sipped and suckled for the fine fruit it bears.
ReplyDeleteHere is my contribution to One Shot this week - The Touch.
half god, half
ReplyDeletedemon that crawled my leg and bit my
heart...fantastic!
These lines stand out: "crawled my leg and bit/ my heart", "nursed you towards the climbing tree", "my hands fractured in service to aid you...." And also the wonderful ending.
ReplyDeleteThat love has such devotion laced with pain.
ReplyDeleteWho wants to embrace death??? or that pain
I love the struggle in this piece
Thanks for sharing with One Shot
Love from the Moon
Celebrate the breath, not the death. Fantastic lines throughout..."and loving you yet is easy," it's that interjection that gets me in this one. So well done.
ReplyDeletethank you eveyone for your comments....blessings...and tomorrow I should have a break and get a a chance to start reading everyones One Shot...thanks again...bkm
ReplyDelete"half god, half demon crawled up your leg and bit your heart..." Love that line. What great images you paint with your words.
ReplyDeleteOh, the imagery in this poem, bkm! So rich and layered and just so really really fine. It's one of those poems that needs to be read several times as it reveals itself more with each read.
ReplyDeleteThere is a beautiful sadness in this poem, and your word choice makes the thematic development very easy to follow even amongst the more personal revelations of suffering in the name of love. You have such a strong voice as a narrator, makes reading all your poetry a very aesthetic experience. Thanks for posting on 1AQ.
ReplyDeletecrb.
It was nice to revisit this again.. thanks
ReplyDeleteॐ नमः शिवाय
Om Namah Shivaya
Twitter: @VerseEveryDay
Blog: http://shadowdancingwithmind.blogspot.com
Some great lines and deep thoughts in this. Excellent.
ReplyDeleteOutstanding piece of work. The title befits the poem. Very nicely done.
ReplyDeleteCheers!
Excellent writing, really incredible and vivid. Wonderful work... I agree with Talon, layers of such depth and needs to be read several times! :) April
ReplyDeleteMackie, this is very emotional for sure! Excellent verse and title.. it is filled with strong love and hints of betrayal as well! A masterpiece!
ReplyDeleteMy One Shot Is HERE:
http://leonnyes.wordpress.com/2010/10/05/the-elements/
Great piece bkm and the sorrow and courage is felt through out.
ReplyDeletewow - what strong words...nursed you towards the climbing tree...was my favorite line..
ReplyDelete"I loved you as a human - half god, half
ReplyDeletedemon that crawled my leg and bit my
heart"
Powerful words, stark, vivid imagery. An emotional ride, and very thoughtful. Quite well done!
Intriguing One Shot, bkm... and I'm with you: Celebrate Life, not Death!
ReplyDelete(So, no wake then?)
Both a celebration to live and an exhortation to take it to its fullest. Well written with a firm touch on many levels. Well done. Thanks, Gay @beachanny
ReplyDeletemy hands fractured in service this vision really got me. Lots of imagery, vivid emotion, good work.
ReplyDeleteI will have to read this one over a few times to get everything there is in its depth if thats even possible. Great poem! :)
ReplyDeleteThis one has som much depth...thought provoking and will also read it again:) Great write my friend xx
ReplyDeleteI like how you took an opening line that read like a probable negative - in my view - and script-flipped into something more enduring and mystical (with a touch of eroticism).
ReplyDeleteGood work. :)